KFC Gravy Tie-Dyed Tees!
I ain’t no damn dirty hippie. I’m a rascally little rat, and I like to stay clean and pretty and carry myself with the sort of...
- Oct 6, 2019
Matt Bevin "Hotdog Head" Gear
Most governors have regular heads, but not Kentucky governor Matt Bevin. His head is long like a hotdog. That's why he's the best and has...
- Sep 20, 2019
Possum Jockeys!
I live in Kentucky, so I probably shouldn't say this, but horses aren't that great. They have one giant toenail on the end of each leg...
- Jun 19, 2019
"I Have Sex with Coal" Gear
I'm afraid, dear reader, that our cherished fossil-fueled way of life may vanish forever if the current trend toward Godless socialism...
- Jun 12, 2019
Dixieland Preserves: "Chick-Infinity" Edition
Earlier this year, I partnered with Kentucky for Kentucky to make my dream of an immortal nugget of Kentucky Derby-winning horse shit a...
- May 24, 2019
Derby Turds Update
Earlier this month, I partnered with Kentucky for Kentucky to bring the world "Derby Turds", 100% real manure from 1997 Kentucky Derby...
- May 1, 2019
Dixieland Preserves: "Derby Turd" Edition
I’ve always got epoxy resin lying around. I’ve been using it in my artwork for almost ten years now. And I’ve put some weird stuff in it...
- Apr 25, 2019
New Art: Main Street Church of Christ
Just wrapped up this big boy. It's a lot. Tons of layers, techniques, and materials. I sourced the historical images from an old...
- Mar 26, 2019
New Art: Jed Clampett Made Of Toby Keith Lyrics
This one's pretty wild and several years in the making. It's not like I spent several years actually working on it, it's just made of a...
- Feb 26, 2019
Freelance Kamikaze: Alien Erotica
You run across some supremely bizarre/insulting stuff when you're looking for freelance writing work on the Internet. People want to pay...
- Feb 25, 2019
I Tricked TV News Into Believing A Gay Church Was Opening In An Old Magic Mart
I have a pretty low opinion of TV news people, but even I was surprised at how hard they swung at this obviously outside pitch. I had a...
- Jan 10, 2019
Pictures of Jackie Chan for Masturbating!
GoogleFi generously gifts their customers a free 20-page photo book once a year. I'm a GoogleFi customer. Here's what I had them make for...
- Jan 2, 2019
I Got My Local Paper To Publish A Poem That's Obviously About Diarrhea
Out of boredom and what I like to think is a righteous sense of justice, I wrote this thinly veiled folk-puke "poem" and sent it to the...
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